I don’t like it here. Hayward sucks. The Bay Area, in general, sucks. I do not belong here. I was so happy in Chico, why did I leave again? When I was bored in Chico there was so much for me to do that I enjoyed doing.

I walked EVERYWHERE. I walked to my pubs, I walked to coffee, I walked to school, I walked downtown, I walked across the street to buy beer, I walked around the corner to have breakfast, I walked home from Kelly’s house at 4am, I walked to my friend’s houses… I walked everywhere. Here in Hayward I don’t walk. Here in the Bay Area I do not walk. The very few things I like to do here–play golf, go to Dave’s house, have a beer at The Bistro–I have to drive. Everything is so spread out you can’t really walk anywhere.

I miss hiking in Bidwell Park, up and down the trails next to the creek filled with trout and sometimes salmon. I miss hiking in the Sierra foothills, thousands of feet above sea-level. I miss my beautiful sweeping views and the crisp pine-tree smell of the forest. I miss my fly fishing creeks and streams. I miss the cheap golf and cheap booze. I miss Chico.

I gotta get out of this place. I feel like I’m rotting here in Hayward. The East Bay is a cesspool of filth. This place sucks. I gotta make a move, and I need to do it quick.

Maybe I’ll just get up and walk out of here? I’ll just pack a little bag and start walking, I don’t know, north or something. I’ll walk until I get tired and then I’ll find a place to rest. I’ll be like Caine in Kung Fu, like Jules in Pulp Fiction wanted to be. I understand now what he was talking about, how he felt. So much of my life has been spent rooted in one place or another. I want to wander. I want to experience a new kind of life.

I gotta get outta here…